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Food Fabulous

Notes from midlife

Are you (a little bit) sober curious?

After a long and busy day, it can feel like there is nothing better than a glass of wine, beer or other alcoholic drink to help you unwind. It's one of the go-to ‘rewards’ for grown up girls to relax, celebrate, commiserate, and so on. But are there times when a bit might be a bit much? If you've ever wondered "should I try cutting back?", this blog is for you...

Are you drinking too much (no judgement)?

Socially, drinking is one of the main ways we enjoy being with friends and trying to cut back can be difficult and often meets with disapproval from others. The trouble is it’s easy for those units to mount up and over time this can have a really detrimental effect on your health, mood, energy levels and weight.

The recommended guidelines for alcohol are no more than 14 units a week, with at least 2 alcohol-free days per week.

A typical bottle of wine will contain 10 units. It’s easy to get through a bottle with three generous glasses in a night! Let’s face it, whoever pours a small glass?

Do you ever wonder if you drink a little too much? (We've most of us been there)

Maybe it’s crossed your mind on occasion that you have a problem with alcohol (even if you’ve not spoken those words out loud)? Do you use alcohol as a social crutch to give you confidence at parties and events? Do you often wonder what life would be like without alcohol or even why on TV, films and even in real life the alcohol flows freely at practically every event? It’s like we should all be drinking, and without it, we must be having less fun.

While you might be eating well, doing your yoga or Pilates, meditating, getting your 10,000 steps every single day, at the end of a long day, you get back from work, kick off your shoes and head for a glass of chilled Sauvignon Blanc. Soon, one glass is a second glass, which becomes the rest of the bottle.

I wonder if that sounds familiar?

If any of these questions above have crossed your mind, perhaps you are sober curious.

Are you sober curious?

The sober curious movement is gathering pace and not drinking is really rather trendy. To be clear ‘sober curious’ is not the same as sobriety (being 100% sober). According to Ruby Warrington, author of the book Sober Curious, it’s not an on-off switch. You are not either a drinker or tee-total. It’s about bringing a “questioning mindset to every drinking situation, rather than going along with the dominant drinking culture”. Sober curious is a movement that welcomes you at any stage of your questioning the role alcohol plays in your life.

It may be that you have already dipped your toe into extended periods of sobriety – Dry January, Go Sober for October. Being sober curious the rest of the time is a natural extension. There are even sober bars popping up where you get to socialise over mocktails and kombucha rather than a G&T.

Author Ruby Warrington – the first to coin the phase – began thinking about her alcohol consumption in 2010 in terms of its impact on her health and wellbeing. She felt she couldn't talk to anyone else about it. After it, it wasn’t like she was drinking secretly or during the day. She was drinking in a very socially-acceptable way you might see openly portrayed on social media. Maybe a few glasses of wine on a few weeknights and a mini-binge at the weekend. Like many, she was simply doing it without question.

Feel like exploring this for yourself?

Ask yourself when you drink:

  • Why am I drinking right now?

  • Is it expected of me that I will have a drink right now? If so, how do I feel about that?

  • What will this drink do for my health and wellbeing?

  • Think about what it is that you actually want.

Don’t be afraid to say to friends that you’re taking some time off from drinking, that (on a night you would normally go to a bar), you’d like to do something different instead. Remember, you don’t have to justify yourself to anyone.

Can you ever drink if you're sober curious?

Being sober curious is not never, never drink. It’s simply being more mindful.

That’s something we could probably all do with more of in every aspect of our lives.

I found these sober curious resources just for you...

Sober Curious by Ruby Warrington (

The Sober Diaries: How one woman stopped drinking and started living by Clare Pooley (

Drink?: The New Science of Alcohol and Your Health by David Nutt (

Alcohol Lied to Me: How to Stop Drinking and Get the Real You Back by Craig Beck (

There are some hypnosis tracks to go with this book by Craig Beck, which are also excellent -


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